Death

The past week has felt almost like a bad dream. Since Monday, things have changed so much that it's just kind of hard to grasp the thoughts.

On Monday, I was at my internship and it was just a usual, normal day. Then, at 11:30, Matt called me. It was weird because he almost never calls me in the middle of the day. But I answered it, and he was crying. He told me something bad had happened and I immediately was in a panic. I had no ideas, but for some reason, I thought it may have had something to do with his mom. And then he said it - "My mom is dead." I was in shock. I really couldn't believe what he was saying. I mean, ok, his mom has been sick for like 6 or 7 years with depression and other problems, but no one expected something like this. She was only 45 years old.

So, anyway, as soon as I found out on Monday, I left work and came to the apartment to find Matt at a total loss for words and a blank look on his face. We sat around for about 30 minutes and then decided we should probably go back to our home towns. So, we packed slowly and forgot almost everything important, and then headed home.

Travis, Matt's brother, was an absolute wreck, and so was Matt's dad. Even though Bob and Sandy were divorced, a part of Matt's dad always seemed to be attached to her and I think he felt incredibly guilty for what had happened. So, we went to Travis's house so everyone could discuss some things. While we were there, we found out that Sandy had been gone for probably a week before anyone even found her. It was still a big question mark as to what really happened, too. Like I said, Sandy had problems with depression, and suicide was in the back of everyone's mind, but it didn't seem to be a likely sinario. She didn't leave a note, and she would have never done that to Travis and Matt. So then we started talking about maybe she had been sick and hadn't been able to contact anyone about it. She didn't have a car or a phone where she lived, and she lived alone, so we thought maybe she just wasn't able to tell anyone when something was wrong.

These were the thoughts that raced through everyone's head for the first two days. On Tuesday, the family all went to the funeral home and Travis and Matt proceeded to make all the arrangements for their mother's funeral. After three hours, cremation was decided upon as the most dignified burial. Since she had been gone for so long before anyone found her, it would have been a closed casket and no one, not even the family, would have been able to see her. Since it was an incredibly bad way to go, Matt felt that the best thing they could do for her would at least to give her some pride in death.

Wednesday was kind of a down day and Matt and I went over to Travis's to go through some pictures and just talk about things. That was when we kind of got the back story to what may have happened with Matt's mom. Bob had been keeping something a secret from Matt and Travis - their mom had been mixed up in drugs. I'm not going to go into details, but it definately answered a lot of questions for Matt and Travis. And it also held a possible answer for her death.

But anywayThe viewing was on Thursday evening and the funeral was on Friday morning. Those were both incredibly difficult days. Now we are back in Findlay and back to normal life. It's weird being back here and both of us having to go back to work and all. Life had completely stopped for the past four days, and now it's back to normal again (well, as normal as can be expected).

So, anyway, the results from the otopsy won't be back for another week probably. Until then, we know that there was no trama involved, so at least she probably didn't suffer. Matt and Travis would just like to know the answer so that the constant wondering as to what happened can be answered.

Oh, and it's incredibly weird to be back in Findlay now after we were at my parents for four straight days. There was always someone around and now it's back to just me and Matt.