Wow - I really should be more dedicated to this thing - Really though I've just been crazy busy. Well, the semester is over, or I should say classes are over. It's the middle of exam week. Thank God I don't have any actual exams. I closest thing I have to an exam is a take home test, but it's more like a paper because there are 4 questions in which all answers have to be in full essay form. Ugghhh to that! But yeah, even though I don't have any actual exams, I have had my share of work to do, especially these past few weeks. Senior Assessment projects were due just before Thanksgiving and then our presentations for them were the week after we got back from break. I already turned in one 10 page paper and did a presentation. I had to do another presentation for my Disney class. I finally finished my stupid project for my News Editing class (where I had to layout an entire issue of our campus newspaper...meaning 9 pages of newspaper with I don't even know how many stoires and pictures) And now I'm still trying to push out another 10 page paper before Thursday. I really don't know which is worse - studying for an exam or doing all these damn projects, papers, and presentations. Thank God this semester is almost over! I'm so excited to be able to relax next semester and just have fun before I graduate!
Moving onto other things, since it's been a while since I wrote, I have yet to mention the fact that Matt quit his rediculous job at Walmart. Yes, that means we aren't bringing any money in at the moment, but I honestly don't care. That job was making him physically ill and the people he had to work with were the biggest group of jerks I've ever seen. So, he's been spending his time writing like crazy and he applied to Owens, so he's hoping to take some classes starting at the beginning of January. Let's hope he can get in!
Jay is 6 months old now! Oh how time flies! Some days you can still see that naughty puppy in him, but most days he's just wonderful to have around. I can remember being so scared after the first few days of having him - wondering if getting him had been the right thing to do - but now I can't imagine what things would be like if we didn't have him. He really keeps me sane and I haven't really have any problems with my anxiety since we got him. It's great!
So, I can't believe it's already almost Christmas. I love this time of year, but I hate that it's gone so quickly. Matt and I have been celebrating the season since the end of October, and now I just can't believe it's almost over. Ohh...and I got a Christmas present for myself...a new tattoo!! I love it! I went and got it this past weekend and it's just so beautiful! It took two hours and hurt like hell, but it was totally worth it! I have to go back in a few weeks to get it finished actually. But yeah, it's a sword lily, which stands for Strength of Character. And the flower grows in a really cool way where the bottom blooms die before the top ones are even out of their buds, so it's a very cool life cycle. And Tony, the guy who did it, incorporated a yin-yang sign into it, which is supposed to symbolize that I'm at harmony with the person I am, or the character I am. So yeah, I love it and I can't wait for it to be completely finished!
Ok, so I think that's enough catching up for now. I've gotten into World of Warcraft in the past few weeks...it's a really bad addiction now, so I think I'm going to go and feed that addiction. Haha.
Wednesday, December 12, 2007
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
It's cloudy and icky...And I'm bored
Ok, so I saw this on one of my friend's blogs and I just had to do it. I know most of you probably won't care to read all of this, but if you do, then you're probably one of the people on the list.
Pick thirty people, in no particular order, and type something that you want to say to them. Do not put their name with each statement. The idea is to say whatever you want to, or whatever needs to be said. It doesn't matter if the people will ever read it or not... just say it.
1. You are the love of my life. I don't know what I would do without you. I am the person I am today because of you. If I had never met you, I probably would have been alone for the past 5 years scared of a relationship and lost in this world. I knew you changed my life when I stopped writing poetry in an attempt to find myself. You gave me inspiration and you made and still make me happier than I ever have been. If I had never met you, I probably would have gone on to be a teacher because I would have been too afraid to try anything different. (not that being a teacher is bad, but it's just not for me). But you taught me to chase after the scary things in life. You are my best friend and know that without you, I would be nothing. I can't wait to spend the rest of my life experiencing the scary things with you.
2. Well, we've known each other for 18 years, 6 months, 22 days, and probably a few hours. I knew our relationship was special when at the age of 21, I can still remember going to see you at the hospital when you were born...And I was only 3. What can I say...You were a companion on rainy days, an inventor of games we only understood, and my first best friend. I hope someday we can have those houses beside each other, sit on our front porches, and talk about the years gone by and how the world is going to shit. There have only ever been four people in my life that truly affected me, and know that you are one of them.
3. Yes, we've been told we have a horrible co-dependent relationship and I don't think we've ever gone a day without speaking to each other at least once, even if it was only to say "Hello". Your mother isn't supposed to be one of your best friends. She is supposed to be someone you don't tell all your secrets to and someone you forget to call for weeks on end. But just know that you are also one of those four people I mentioned above.
4. I will always be your little girl, won't I? It doesn't matter if I'm 21, 40, or 70, you'll still say I'm yours. I'm honestly not sure what to say about you. You've always been there for me. You have been a constant in my life and you instilled so many wonderful values and ideals in my mind. Unfortunately, it took me until this year to realize how much I would miss you when I go off and start my own life. Just know you are also one of those four people.
5. I hated you for what you did to me when I was a kid, but I realize now I wouldn't be who I was without you...So, as hard as it is to say this, I forgive you.
6. You were such a big, jolly man. You always reminded me of Santa Claus, especially in your later years when you had your beard. When I was a kid, I honestly was a little scared of you. Mostly though, I'm sorry I never said goodbye.
7. I still remember your voice after all these years. (although I don't know how anyone could forget a raspy voice like that) You were the person who created my ability to write poetry and I will forever thank you for that, even if it did occur only after your death. I still find myself thinking, "I wish she knew the person I am today." I miss you.
8. I didn't meet you until I was a teenager and then you left suddenly and unexpectedly. I wish you could have seen your future grandchildren...I wish you could have seen your son become a success...And I wish I would have told you, if only once, that I loved you and respected you.
9. I will forever remember the days we spent on your farm. I will forever remember your older sister and dad, and cry for the way things ended up. You were my first best friend outside my household. The things I will remember the most are riding the cow in your dad's barn and creating Creepyville. Know that even though we don't see each other that much anymore, you are still one of my best friends.
10. You taught me how to chase after my dreams and how to not be scared of male authority figures. Thank you.
11. You were a best friend for three years and I liked you for all that time. Then we ruined that friendship with one kiss. I will forever hate myself for that.
12. We became friends in the weirdest way. For many years after we started our friendship, I disliked you for the things you did and how you made me feel invisible. It took three years, but I finally forgave you for your self-centeredness in high school. And I'm honestly glad you cried on my shoulder all those years ago.
13. I truly dispise you. I'm sorry, but I do.
14. People say we look alike and we always try to deny it, but I agree with them. I'm sorry I don't see you more. I really do miss our conversations.
15. Thanks for introducing me to Rulfie. He got me through many hard times in my life.
16. I wish you would have stayed in Findlay.
17. I was so glad when I finally started talking to you because I had someone who could relate to the way I felt in my relationship because you are married. I used to think you were a bitch, but I love you. I hope you know that.
18. Sometimes you really annoy me and your quarks get on my nerves. College wouldn't have been the same without you, though, and I love you too!
19. I never met you, but I heard many stories about you. Everyone says I'm just like you, even in the way I walk. I wish I could have met you just once.
20. What happened to the great relationship we used to have? I miss our girl talks. I will still always remember when you told me I was your favorite.
21. I remember creating zoos with you in your yard and many summers spent visiting the real zoo. We were connected at the hip as young kids. I miss that.
22. I don't understand what I did to you to make you hate me and try to steal my best friend when we were kids, but I'm ok with that.
23. You fell off the face of the earth. I haven't seen you since you were 15. You were a very influential part of my childhood and I wish just once I could see you again.
24. Secretly, I would go into your spare bedroom and cry when you yelled at me. I was so incredibly scared of you. Now I don't know why.
25. We were having a family get-together and you were sitting at the table. I was in junior high. I walked by you and you told me to turn my head. Then everyone laughed. If it weren't for you, I probably would have never realized I had a big nose. I wish I could have remained in ignorance.
26. I have never met you, but I really wish I could. I've known you for 8 years, and I just hope that what I do for you makes you happy. I hope someday I can visit.
27. You truly piss me off. Why did you have to change him?
28. Stragely enough, I miss you. The only thing I remember about you is your name and that you had curly black hair. Sometimes I wish you would have been my aunt instead of her.
29. Thank you for making me love animals!
30. And finally, know that you taught me a great deal about friendship and about stubborness. You were a pretty great friend and I'm sorry we didn't stay closer.
Pick thirty people, in no particular order, and type something that you want to say to them. Do not put their name with each statement. The idea is to say whatever you want to, or whatever needs to be said. It doesn't matter if the people will ever read it or not... just say it.
1. You are the love of my life. I don't know what I would do without you. I am the person I am today because of you. If I had never met you, I probably would have been alone for the past 5 years scared of a relationship and lost in this world. I knew you changed my life when I stopped writing poetry in an attempt to find myself. You gave me inspiration and you made and still make me happier than I ever have been. If I had never met you, I probably would have gone on to be a teacher because I would have been too afraid to try anything different. (not that being a teacher is bad, but it's just not for me). But you taught me to chase after the scary things in life. You are my best friend and know that without you, I would be nothing. I can't wait to spend the rest of my life experiencing the scary things with you.
2. Well, we've known each other for 18 years, 6 months, 22 days, and probably a few hours. I knew our relationship was special when at the age of 21, I can still remember going to see you at the hospital when you were born...And I was only 3. What can I say...You were a companion on rainy days, an inventor of games we only understood, and my first best friend. I hope someday we can have those houses beside each other, sit on our front porches, and talk about the years gone by and how the world is going to shit. There have only ever been four people in my life that truly affected me, and know that you are one of them.
3. Yes, we've been told we have a horrible co-dependent relationship and I don't think we've ever gone a day without speaking to each other at least once, even if it was only to say "Hello". Your mother isn't supposed to be one of your best friends. She is supposed to be someone you don't tell all your secrets to and someone you forget to call for weeks on end. But just know that you are also one of those four people I mentioned above.
4. I will always be your little girl, won't I? It doesn't matter if I'm 21, 40, or 70, you'll still say I'm yours. I'm honestly not sure what to say about you. You've always been there for me. You have been a constant in my life and you instilled so many wonderful values and ideals in my mind. Unfortunately, it took me until this year to realize how much I would miss you when I go off and start my own life. Just know you are also one of those four people.
5. I hated you for what you did to me when I was a kid, but I realize now I wouldn't be who I was without you...So, as hard as it is to say this, I forgive you.
6. You were such a big, jolly man. You always reminded me of Santa Claus, especially in your later years when you had your beard. When I was a kid, I honestly was a little scared of you. Mostly though, I'm sorry I never said goodbye.
7. I still remember your voice after all these years. (although I don't know how anyone could forget a raspy voice like that) You were the person who created my ability to write poetry and I will forever thank you for that, even if it did occur only after your death. I still find myself thinking, "I wish she knew the person I am today." I miss you.
8. I didn't meet you until I was a teenager and then you left suddenly and unexpectedly. I wish you could have seen your future grandchildren...I wish you could have seen your son become a success...And I wish I would have told you, if only once, that I loved you and respected you.
9. I will forever remember the days we spent on your farm. I will forever remember your older sister and dad, and cry for the way things ended up. You were my first best friend outside my household. The things I will remember the most are riding the cow in your dad's barn and creating Creepyville. Know that even though we don't see each other that much anymore, you are still one of my best friends.
10. You taught me how to chase after my dreams and how to not be scared of male authority figures. Thank you.
11. You were a best friend for three years and I liked you for all that time. Then we ruined that friendship with one kiss. I will forever hate myself for that.
12. We became friends in the weirdest way. For many years after we started our friendship, I disliked you for the things you did and how you made me feel invisible. It took three years, but I finally forgave you for your self-centeredness in high school. And I'm honestly glad you cried on my shoulder all those years ago.
13. I truly dispise you. I'm sorry, but I do.
14. People say we look alike and we always try to deny it, but I agree with them. I'm sorry I don't see you more. I really do miss our conversations.
15. Thanks for introducing me to Rulfie. He got me through many hard times in my life.
16. I wish you would have stayed in Findlay.
17. I was so glad when I finally started talking to you because I had someone who could relate to the way I felt in my relationship because you are married. I used to think you were a bitch, but I love you. I hope you know that.
18. Sometimes you really annoy me and your quarks get on my nerves. College wouldn't have been the same without you, though, and I love you too!
19. I never met you, but I heard many stories about you. Everyone says I'm just like you, even in the way I walk. I wish I could have met you just once.
20. What happened to the great relationship we used to have? I miss our girl talks. I will still always remember when you told me I was your favorite.
21. I remember creating zoos with you in your yard and many summers spent visiting the real zoo. We were connected at the hip as young kids. I miss that.
22. I don't understand what I did to you to make you hate me and try to steal my best friend when we were kids, but I'm ok with that.
23. You fell off the face of the earth. I haven't seen you since you were 15. You were a very influential part of my childhood and I wish just once I could see you again.
24. Secretly, I would go into your spare bedroom and cry when you yelled at me. I was so incredibly scared of you. Now I don't know why.
25. We were having a family get-together and you were sitting at the table. I was in junior high. I walked by you and you told me to turn my head. Then everyone laughed. If it weren't for you, I probably would have never realized I had a big nose. I wish I could have remained in ignorance.
26. I have never met you, but I really wish I could. I've known you for 8 years, and I just hope that what I do for you makes you happy. I hope someday I can visit.
27. You truly piss me off. Why did you have to change him?
28. Stragely enough, I miss you. The only thing I remember about you is your name and that you had curly black hair. Sometimes I wish you would have been my aunt instead of her.
29. Thank you for making me love animals!
30. And finally, know that you taught me a great deal about friendship and about stubborness. You were a pretty great friend and I'm sorry we didn't stay closer.
Monday, October 1, 2007
Rain, puppies, television, and pencils
Well, because it's been a while since my last blog, I figured I'd catch people up on what's been going on. I can't believe it's already October. The first month of my senior year of college is gone and school kinda sucks. Yeah, I think I say that just about every year, and while things aren't that horrible with classes, I am feeling the strain of the semester. I just have sooo much busy work in my classes and it drives me crazy. I have two quizzes and two writing/editing assignments to turn in each week for my News Editing class. I have to read upwards of 50 pages in a book each week and turn in a two or three page response for my Disney class. I have to go to my religion class every Tuesdays and Thursdays and have my blood pressure raise because people don't understand we are supposed to be studying the old testament from a literary standpoint instead of talking about their opinion on religion every class time. And I don't even want to think about Senior Assessment right now because my project is due in about a month and I have yet to even start it.
Not only are my classes kinda crappy at the moment, but UFTV and Findlay Edition are sucking incredibly this semester. I am trying to run a show that only have a 5 person crew for when I usually need at least 7 or 8 to get even a mediocre product. I love that I'm getting my tuition paid for by being a senior producer, but I hate that no one even seems to care, and I honestly wish I could just quit. I loved my internship this summer being an assistant producer and getting write the days I was there, but I just hate doing it at school when no one else seems as dedicated or cares as much as me. Ugghh...
Not only do classes kind of suck and TV definitely sucks, but they are keeping me so busy that I'm having trouble finding time to hang out with Matt. It's really depressing because he gets really lonely since he doesn't really have any friends in Findlay, so I always feel bad for being so busy.
Ok, so to get away from school for a bit, Jay is the best puppy in the world! I just love having him around! Ever since I got him I've been less stressed about stuff and he just keeps me so busy. I know it sounds crazy, but I honestly enjoy taking him for a walk each day. We usually take about a 2 mile walk and I actually hate it when I don't have time to take him on a walk. He's getting so big now, though. He's probably ten pounds now! I can't believe he was only about 4 or 5 pounds when we got him! I was looking at the pics from the first day we got him and I couldn't believe how young he looked. He's starting to get almost too big to sleep inbetween me and Matt now. We're probably going to have to figure out another sleeping arrangement for him soon.
Anyway, the last thing I wanted to mention was how crappy the weather was today and it just reminds me of how much I hate winter weather. I know it's not winter yet, but I always get so depressed after it's been dreary for a while. I hope the weather still stays nice for a while. Oh, and I can't wait until the leaves start changing! I love Autumn because of all the colors! I really want to get some fall decorations for outside the apartment because I think it would be cute!
Not only are my classes kinda crappy at the moment, but UFTV and Findlay Edition are sucking incredibly this semester. I am trying to run a show that only have a 5 person crew for when I usually need at least 7 or 8 to get even a mediocre product. I love that I'm getting my tuition paid for by being a senior producer, but I hate that no one even seems to care, and I honestly wish I could just quit. I loved my internship this summer being an assistant producer and getting write the days I was there, but I just hate doing it at school when no one else seems as dedicated or cares as much as me. Ugghh...
Not only do classes kind of suck and TV definitely sucks, but they are keeping me so busy that I'm having trouble finding time to hang out with Matt. It's really depressing because he gets really lonely since he doesn't really have any friends in Findlay, so I always feel bad for being so busy.
Ok, so to get away from school for a bit, Jay is the best puppy in the world! I just love having him around! Ever since I got him I've been less stressed about stuff and he just keeps me so busy. I know it sounds crazy, but I honestly enjoy taking him for a walk each day. We usually take about a 2 mile walk and I actually hate it when I don't have time to take him on a walk. He's getting so big now, though. He's probably ten pounds now! I can't believe he was only about 4 or 5 pounds when we got him! I was looking at the pics from the first day we got him and I couldn't believe how young he looked. He's starting to get almost too big to sleep inbetween me and Matt now. We're probably going to have to figure out another sleeping arrangement for him soon.
Anyway, the last thing I wanted to mention was how crappy the weather was today and it just reminds me of how much I hate winter weather. I know it's not winter yet, but I always get so depressed after it's been dreary for a while. I hope the weather still stays nice for a while. Oh, and I can't wait until the leaves start changing! I love Autumn because of all the colors! I really want to get some fall decorations for outside the apartment because I think it would be cute!
Saturday, September 8, 2007
The Start of School...And sort of the End of School too
So, I have gotten through my first two weeks of my senior year...and for some reason it didn't strike me until a few days ago that I will never have a first day of school again...
It's kind of depressing actually to think about that. I have always enjoyed school for some reason. It's never really been that hard for me and I enjoy the day to day challenge that school and classes bring. After this year, I will never have school again...
Maybe it's because I grew up with teachers and spent time in a classroom even at the age of about 4 months that I just feel comfortable and at home in a school. It's just going to be so weird to have a job next year instead of going back to school.
Besides being somewhat depressed about this, school has been going pretty good so far. I don't have a whole lot of classes and my schedule is pretty great. I don't even have classes on Fridays. TV is starting up next week, so that should make things a little more interesting and a little more busy. The past two weeks have been pretty easy, but I know with TV starting it's going to be different now. That first two weeks were kind an adjustment too. I'm not used to having Matt around when I'm in school, so I feel like I kind of ignored him these past two weeks, so I have to get better at that. Jay is also taking some getting used to - I can't leave him alone for long periods of time, so that also kind of complicates things in a way. But I'm sure with time those things will get better.
On an ending note, I got a new cell phone today! I'm way excited about it! I can use it as an MP3 player too, which is really cool because my iPod has been broken for a while now, so it will be nice to have that type of thing again. It cost me an arm and leg, but oh well - it's a sweet phone!
It's kind of depressing actually to think about that. I have always enjoyed school for some reason. It's never really been that hard for me and I enjoy the day to day challenge that school and classes bring. After this year, I will never have school again...
Maybe it's because I grew up with teachers and spent time in a classroom even at the age of about 4 months that I just feel comfortable and at home in a school. It's just going to be so weird to have a job next year instead of going back to school.
Besides being somewhat depressed about this, school has been going pretty good so far. I don't have a whole lot of classes and my schedule is pretty great. I don't even have classes on Fridays. TV is starting up next week, so that should make things a little more interesting and a little more busy. The past two weeks have been pretty easy, but I know with TV starting it's going to be different now. That first two weeks were kind an adjustment too. I'm not used to having Matt around when I'm in school, so I feel like I kind of ignored him these past two weeks, so I have to get better at that. Jay is also taking some getting used to - I can't leave him alone for long periods of time, so that also kind of complicates things in a way. But I'm sure with time those things will get better.
On an ending note, I got a new cell phone today! I'm way excited about it! I can use it as an MP3 player too, which is really cool because my iPod has been broken for a while now, so it will be nice to have that type of thing again. It cost me an arm and leg, but oh well - it's a sweet phone!
Monday, August 20, 2007
A Little Bundle of Joy
Ok, so I'm going to try this again... Last night I wrote a whole blog and it didn't go through, so I lost the entire thing...It better not happen again!
Anyway, we have a new member of our household... A 10 week old male puppy named Jay Lee. It was somewhat of an impulse buy, but Matt and I were visiting my parents house and Erica, my mom, and us decided to go to the pet store the one day. Well, we went to get a fish for Erica's salt water tank, but when we got there, they had these adorable little puppies called boggles - half beagle and half boxer. Well, ever since Matt and I moved into the apartment, we've talked about getting a dog, but we just couldn't afford it. Not only did you have to pay for the dog and all it's needs, but there is also a 250 dollar non-refundable deposit at the apartment complex and an extra 50 bucks a month. But yippee for Erica! She decided to go half on everything so that we could keep him at the apartment and everything. So, now we have a puppy! Like I said, his name is Jay Lee, but Lee is just his middle name, and it's in remembrance of Matt's mom because that was her middle name. He is just absolutely adorable with a brown and black coat with white patches. He's only 5 pounds now, but he'll get to be about 20 or 25.
I'm surprised that he's already doing as well as he is with the whole house training thing. He knows that outside means potty and even goes to the door a lot of times when he has to go. The only time he has an accident is when he gets over excited or when it's cold or rainy outside. I'm sure the cold and rainy thing will just be with time, though. He'll obviously need to get over that. he's also getting better about staying in his cage when we leave. He hated it at first and even tried to bite his way out of it, but he seems to have gotten over that and is now just calm about it. He still whines for the first few minutes, but he's usually fine after that. We can't get him to sleep by himself, though, so he sleeps with me in bed. Yeah, I know - I'm spoiling him, but I just hate to hear him cry at night, and if he's going to be more comfortable sleeping with me, then I'll just let him.
So, other than Jay, I haven't really been doing much for the past week. My internship got done last Monday and I stopped working at Walmart a few weeks ago, so now I'm just getting ready for school to start. I can't believe there is only a week left. The summer flew by so fast. I can't believe I only have one year left in college. It's so scary to think about. Erica moves into her dorm on Friday, which is also scary to think about. I'm worried about how my mom is going to be when we are both out of the house for the school year. It's going to be weird for her. I hope that I can go home on weekends to visit a lot. I hope everything goes ok this year with being full time producer. Thankfully I don't have a whole lot of classes because then I can concentrate most of my time on TV and whatnot.
Well, Erica is here but is probably going to be leaving soon, so I think I'm going to hang out with her for a while. She's been here for the past four nights, so now it's going to be weird her not being here. Jay is going to miss her because now it's just going to be me and Matt to hang out with. Poor little guy...It's good she'll be back on Friday, though!
Anyway, we have a new member of our household... A 10 week old male puppy named Jay Lee. It was somewhat of an impulse buy, but Matt and I were visiting my parents house and Erica, my mom, and us decided to go to the pet store the one day. Well, we went to get a fish for Erica's salt water tank, but when we got there, they had these adorable little puppies called boggles - half beagle and half boxer. Well, ever since Matt and I moved into the apartment, we've talked about getting a dog, but we just couldn't afford it. Not only did you have to pay for the dog and all it's needs, but there is also a 250 dollar non-refundable deposit at the apartment complex and an extra 50 bucks a month. But yippee for Erica! She decided to go half on everything so that we could keep him at the apartment and everything. So, now we have a puppy! Like I said, his name is Jay Lee, but Lee is just his middle name, and it's in remembrance of Matt's mom because that was her middle name. He is just absolutely adorable with a brown and black coat with white patches. He's only 5 pounds now, but he'll get to be about 20 or 25.
I'm surprised that he's already doing as well as he is with the whole house training thing. He knows that outside means potty and even goes to the door a lot of times when he has to go. The only time he has an accident is when he gets over excited or when it's cold or rainy outside. I'm sure the cold and rainy thing will just be with time, though. He'll obviously need to get over that. he's also getting better about staying in his cage when we leave. He hated it at first and even tried to bite his way out of it, but he seems to have gotten over that and is now just calm about it. He still whines for the first few minutes, but he's usually fine after that. We can't get him to sleep by himself, though, so he sleeps with me in bed. Yeah, I know - I'm spoiling him, but I just hate to hear him cry at night, and if he's going to be more comfortable sleeping with me, then I'll just let him.
So, other than Jay, I haven't really been doing much for the past week. My internship got done last Monday and I stopped working at Walmart a few weeks ago, so now I'm just getting ready for school to start. I can't believe there is only a week left. The summer flew by so fast. I can't believe I only have one year left in college. It's so scary to think about. Erica moves into her dorm on Friday, which is also scary to think about. I'm worried about how my mom is going to be when we are both out of the house for the school year. It's going to be weird for her. I hope that I can go home on weekends to visit a lot. I hope everything goes ok this year with being full time producer. Thankfully I don't have a whole lot of classes because then I can concentrate most of my time on TV and whatnot.
Well, Erica is here but is probably going to be leaving soon, so I think I'm going to hang out with her for a while. She's been here for the past four nights, so now it's going to be weird her not being here. Jay is going to miss her because now it's just going to be me and Matt to hang out with. Poor little guy...It's good she'll be back on Friday, though!
Monday, August 6, 2007
Broncitus and Blahhh
So, I've been sick since Friday, and it really sucks. I haven't had broncitus since I was in high school and I forgot how long it took to get over it and how many different stages you have to go through. Well, let's see - it all started Friday night when my throat started hurting. By 3 am, it was so swollen that I was having trouble breating and swallowing, so Matt took me to the emergency room. They told me it was just a virus and that I would be better in a few days. Well, I sat around feeling miserable all Saturday and then when I woke up Sunday, I felt even worse than before. Eventually, I figured out with the help of my mom that I probably didn't just have a virus, so Matt took me to the urgent care clinic. After 30 minutes of waiting, I found out that I have broncitus and an upper respiratory infection that's affecting my ears and sinuses. So, now it's Monday night, and although I'm feeling a little better and at least I'm not coughing every 2 minutes, my nose is still incredibly stuffed up and my head feels like it weighs about 10 pounds more than usual. Oh, and with all my sinus pressure and whatnot, my lymphnods on the back of my neck have swollen and so my neck and head have been hurting all today.
The only good news about being sick is that I haven't had to work at Walmart for five straight days. And since I gave them my two weeks notice two weeks ago tomorrow, I don't think I'm going to go back to work at all. I was technically supposed to work Tuesday and Wednesday, but I don't think I want to, and honestly I don't think I'd be able to with the way I still feel. Maybe I'll just go to Toledo on Wednesday and Thursday instead, if I'm feeling up to it since I missed today.
I can't believe school starts in three weeks. The summer has just flown by so fast. At least Matt and I got to go to the zoo a few weeks ago. It was something that I really wanted to do this summer and I was afraid I wouldn't get to with how much I was working and everything. But yeah, it was really great. Matt bought me this little meerkat stuffed animal and I just love it! Ok, well, I think that's about all I have to talk about for now. I'll try not to make it as long between my blogs from now on!
The only good news about being sick is that I haven't had to work at Walmart for five straight days. And since I gave them my two weeks notice two weeks ago tomorrow, I don't think I'm going to go back to work at all. I was technically supposed to work Tuesday and Wednesday, but I don't think I want to, and honestly I don't think I'd be able to with the way I still feel. Maybe I'll just go to Toledo on Wednesday and Thursday instead, if I'm feeling up to it since I missed today.
I can't believe school starts in three weeks. The summer has just flown by so fast. At least Matt and I got to go to the zoo a few weeks ago. It was something that I really wanted to do this summer and I was afraid I wouldn't get to with how much I was working and everything. But yeah, it was really great. Matt bought me this little meerkat stuffed animal and I just love it! Ok, well, I think that's about all I have to talk about for now. I'll try not to make it as long between my blogs from now on!
Thursday, July 19, 2007
Being Stressed During the Summer is Just Wrong....Very, Very Wrong!
So, it's been kind of hectic lately. I've been working just about nonstop at Walmart for the past two or three weeks. My first day off is tomorrow. As a result of this constant work, I threw my neck and upper back out and I've had to go to a chiropractor three times in less than a week, and then I stressed myself out so much I ended up sick on Sunday night and threw up. I'm not usually the type to make myself THAT stressed. It was weird. I just had one of those break downs where everything felt like it was going wrong.
This is just a few of the things that I've been stressed about -
1) I'm running out of money from my loans and even though Walmart rules my life, I barely get enough from my pay checks to pay for my bills and rent.
2) Matt has been having a hard time dealing with the death of his mom. I think it has finally hit him. He had to go on leave from work because it was affecting his performance. So, needless-to-say, I worry about him.
3) Our apartment is kind of a mess because I never have time to clean anymore. Not that it looks like crap or unlivable, it's just that I really wish I at least had time to do the dishes every once in a while.
4) I had to start going to a chiropractor, which I thought was going to be incredibly expensive. This one actually has some good news involved, though, because I found out that our insurance will pay for my visits. So, ok, we can knock that one off the list, but I was worried about it on Sunday.
5) My friends are too busy to see me and I'm too busy to see them. Matt is my best friend and I love living with him, but sometimes I just really wish that I could hang out with my friends, or at least talk to them. Sometimes I just feel incredibly isolated in Findlay.
6) And finally, I miss my family. I think it has gotten to that point of feeling a bit of homesickness. I love the apartment, I love Findlay, and I love living with Matt...I only wish I had more time to go home and see my family and my cat. It makes me crazy the amount of time I have to spend working.
Ok, so that's most of the basics of my stress. Most of them are ok now. I mean, Matt is on leave from work, so he's feeling a bit better now. My mom is coming tomorrow to help me and Matt clean our apartment, so that will hopefully be taken care of tomorrow. And hopefully I'll be able to go home sometime next week, if I can get a freaking day off.
So, anyway, that is what has been going on with me for about the past week....work, work, stress, and more work. Hopefully things are looking up, though. I hate to say it, but I'm actually looking forward to school starting. Then maybe I'll have a little bit of time to relax. (wow, I never thought my summer would be busier than my school year).
Now I will end this blog with some words that I thought of today while I was on my lunch break...A kind of poem I guess you could say...
Obscure Image
The image slacks
Obscurred
The edges smudging
What do you think it used to be?
Do you ever wonder?
It has some shape
It carries some form
But...
What was it?
The blur of the moment
The intensity of the corners
The colors of the depressed mind
Light pinks, light grays
Smudging
Wetness
It slacks the image
I don't know what it used to be
A continuous wonder
Obscurring the thoughts
This is just a few of the things that I've been stressed about -
1) I'm running out of money from my loans and even though Walmart rules my life, I barely get enough from my pay checks to pay for my bills and rent.
2) Matt has been having a hard time dealing with the death of his mom. I think it has finally hit him. He had to go on leave from work because it was affecting his performance. So, needless-to-say, I worry about him.
3) Our apartment is kind of a mess because I never have time to clean anymore. Not that it looks like crap or unlivable, it's just that I really wish I at least had time to do the dishes every once in a while.
4) I had to start going to a chiropractor, which I thought was going to be incredibly expensive. This one actually has some good news involved, though, because I found out that our insurance will pay for my visits. So, ok, we can knock that one off the list, but I was worried about it on Sunday.
5) My friends are too busy to see me and I'm too busy to see them. Matt is my best friend and I love living with him, but sometimes I just really wish that I could hang out with my friends, or at least talk to them. Sometimes I just feel incredibly isolated in Findlay.
6) And finally, I miss my family. I think it has gotten to that point of feeling a bit of homesickness. I love the apartment, I love Findlay, and I love living with Matt...I only wish I had more time to go home and see my family and my cat. It makes me crazy the amount of time I have to spend working.
Ok, so that's most of the basics of my stress. Most of them are ok now. I mean, Matt is on leave from work, so he's feeling a bit better now. My mom is coming tomorrow to help me and Matt clean our apartment, so that will hopefully be taken care of tomorrow. And hopefully I'll be able to go home sometime next week, if I can get a freaking day off.
So, anyway, that is what has been going on with me for about the past week....work, work, stress, and more work. Hopefully things are looking up, though. I hate to say it, but I'm actually looking forward to school starting. Then maybe I'll have a little bit of time to relax. (wow, I never thought my summer would be busier than my school year).
Now I will end this blog with some words that I thought of today while I was on my lunch break...A kind of poem I guess you could say...
Obscure Image
The image slacks
Obscurred
The edges smudging
What do you think it used to be?
Do you ever wonder?
It has some shape
It carries some form
But...
What was it?
The blur of the moment
The intensity of the corners
The colors of the depressed mind
Light pinks, light grays
Smudging
Wetness
It slacks the image
I don't know what it used to be
A continuous wonder
Obscurring the thoughts
Monday, July 2, 2007
Screw Up
Stupid blogger! Why isn't it showing my new post?? I'm confused....
Sorry, I just had to vent for a sec!
Sorry, I just had to vent for a sec!
So This Is July
I can't believe that it has been two weeks since Sandy died. It still feels weird to think about the fact that she'll never be around again. It didn't occur to me until this past weekend that I'd never get to eat her wonderful food again. She always made the best meals and I always ate them even when I wasn't hungry. She was such a great cook and I'm really going to miss that.
Travis and Matt went through all of her stuff this past week and got it all organized. Matt brought home a ton of boxes with stuff he wanted to keep. A lot of it is just for memories sake. A lot of it is pictures and stuff from grade school, too. It was pretty cool to go through that stuff and see Matt when he was a little kid. He had a different life before I met him, and I love learning all about it.
Onto other things, though...
I missed the Defiance fireworks last night. I'm so depressed. I think this is the first time ever that I missed them. I wanted to go back for them, but I worked until 10 pm last night. It sucked. I'm glad that I'll probably still get to go to the Findlay fireworks, though. The family is coming up on Wednesday and then we're going to go. I work until 8 that evening, but at least that still gives me time to go see them.
I can't believe that it is already July. This summer seems to be going quicker than even last summer, which I thought went incredibly fast. The only thing that I'm happy about is that I won't have to adjust to anything this fall. I'm so used to having to leave home and go back to school and be depressed for the first two weeks or so, but now I'm already home, and that is exciting. The only thing that I'm going to be worried about is Mom getting used to having no kids in her house come September. I just hope that she doesn't get depressed or shut off. I think she'll be fine, but it's going to take a while and I worry about her.
I'm excited about tomorrow. Matt and I are hopefull going to go swimming at the public pool. I haven't been swimming since two summers ago, so I'm incredibly anxious to go. I hope that we'll go see a movie, too. It's nice that we're going to both have the day off tomorrow, because that doesn't happen very often.
So anyway, I think that's enough for now. I'm in Toledo at work, so I should probably get back to doing real work.
Travis and Matt went through all of her stuff this past week and got it all organized. Matt brought home a ton of boxes with stuff he wanted to keep. A lot of it is just for memories sake. A lot of it is pictures and stuff from grade school, too. It was pretty cool to go through that stuff and see Matt when he was a little kid. He had a different life before I met him, and I love learning all about it.
Onto other things, though...
I missed the Defiance fireworks last night. I'm so depressed. I think this is the first time ever that I missed them. I wanted to go back for them, but I worked until 10 pm last night. It sucked. I'm glad that I'll probably still get to go to the Findlay fireworks, though. The family is coming up on Wednesday and then we're going to go. I work until 8 that evening, but at least that still gives me time to go see them.
I can't believe that it is already July. This summer seems to be going quicker than even last summer, which I thought went incredibly fast. The only thing that I'm happy about is that I won't have to adjust to anything this fall. I'm so used to having to leave home and go back to school and be depressed for the first two weeks or so, but now I'm already home, and that is exciting. The only thing that I'm going to be worried about is Mom getting used to having no kids in her house come September. I just hope that she doesn't get depressed or shut off. I think she'll be fine, but it's going to take a while and I worry about her.
I'm excited about tomorrow. Matt and I are hopefull going to go swimming at the public pool. I haven't been swimming since two summers ago, so I'm incredibly anxious to go. I hope that we'll go see a movie, too. It's nice that we're going to both have the day off tomorrow, because that doesn't happen very often.
So anyway, I think that's enough for now. I'm in Toledo at work, so I should probably get back to doing real work.
Saturday, June 23, 2007
Death
The past week has felt almost like a bad dream. Since Monday, things have changed so much that it's just kind of hard to grasp the thoughts.
On Monday, I was at my internship and it was just a usual, normal day. Then, at 11:30, Matt called me. It was weird because he almost never calls me in the middle of the day. But I answered it, and he was crying. He told me something bad had happened and I immediately was in a panic. I had no ideas, but for some reason, I thought it may have had something to do with his mom. And then he said it - "My mom is dead." I was in shock. I really couldn't believe what he was saying. I mean, ok, his mom has been sick for like 6 or 7 years with depression and other problems, but no one expected something like this. She was only 45 years old.
So, anyway, as soon as I found out on Monday, I left work and came to the apartment to find Matt at a total loss for words and a blank look on his face. We sat around for about 30 minutes and then decided we should probably go back to our home towns. So, we packed slowly and forgot almost everything important, and then headed home.
Travis, Matt's brother, was an absolute wreck, and so was Matt's dad. Even though Bob and Sandy were divorced, a part of Matt's dad always seemed to be attached to her and I think he felt incredibly guilty for what had happened. So, we went to Travis's house so everyone could discuss some things. While we were there, we found out that Sandy had been gone for probably a week before anyone even found her. It was still a big question mark as to what really happened, too. Like I said, Sandy had problems with depression, and suicide was in the back of everyone's mind, but it didn't seem to be a likely sinario. She didn't leave a note, and she would have never done that to Travis and Matt. So then we started talking about maybe she had been sick and hadn't been able to contact anyone about it. She didn't have a car or a phone where she lived, and she lived alone, so we thought maybe she just wasn't able to tell anyone when something was wrong.
These were the thoughts that raced through everyone's head for the first two days. On Tuesday, the family all went to the funeral home and Travis and Matt proceeded to make all the arrangements for their mother's funeral. After three hours, cremation was decided upon as the most dignified burial. Since she had been gone for so long before anyone found her, it would have been a closed casket and no one, not even the family, would have been able to see her. Since it was an incredibly bad way to go, Matt felt that the best thing they could do for her would at least to give her some pride in death.
Wednesday was kind of a down day and Matt and I went over to Travis's to go through some pictures and just talk about things. That was when we kind of got the back story to what may have happened with Matt's mom. Bob had been keeping something a secret from Matt and Travis - their mom had been mixed up in drugs. I'm not going to go into details, but it definately answered a lot of questions for Matt and Travis. And it also held a possible answer for her death.
But anywayThe viewing was on Thursday evening and the funeral was on Friday morning. Those were both incredibly difficult days. Now we are back in Findlay and back to normal life. It's weird being back here and both of us having to go back to work and all. Life had completely stopped for the past four days, and now it's back to normal again (well, as normal as can be expected).
So, anyway, the results from the otopsy won't be back for another week probably. Until then, we know that there was no trama involved, so at least she probably didn't suffer. Matt and Travis would just like to know the answer so that the constant wondering as to what happened can be answered.
Oh, and it's incredibly weird to be back in Findlay now after we were at my parents for four straight days. There was always someone around and now it's back to just me and Matt.
On Monday, I was at my internship and it was just a usual, normal day. Then, at 11:30, Matt called me. It was weird because he almost never calls me in the middle of the day. But I answered it, and he was crying. He told me something bad had happened and I immediately was in a panic. I had no ideas, but for some reason, I thought it may have had something to do with his mom. And then he said it - "My mom is dead." I was in shock. I really couldn't believe what he was saying. I mean, ok, his mom has been sick for like 6 or 7 years with depression and other problems, but no one expected something like this. She was only 45 years old.
So, anyway, as soon as I found out on Monday, I left work and came to the apartment to find Matt at a total loss for words and a blank look on his face. We sat around for about 30 minutes and then decided we should probably go back to our home towns. So, we packed slowly and forgot almost everything important, and then headed home.
Travis, Matt's brother, was an absolute wreck, and so was Matt's dad. Even though Bob and Sandy were divorced, a part of Matt's dad always seemed to be attached to her and I think he felt incredibly guilty for what had happened. So, we went to Travis's house so everyone could discuss some things. While we were there, we found out that Sandy had been gone for probably a week before anyone even found her. It was still a big question mark as to what really happened, too. Like I said, Sandy had problems with depression, and suicide was in the back of everyone's mind, but it didn't seem to be a likely sinario. She didn't leave a note, and she would have never done that to Travis and Matt. So then we started talking about maybe she had been sick and hadn't been able to contact anyone about it. She didn't have a car or a phone where she lived, and she lived alone, so we thought maybe she just wasn't able to tell anyone when something was wrong.
These were the thoughts that raced through everyone's head for the first two days. On Tuesday, the family all went to the funeral home and Travis and Matt proceeded to make all the arrangements for their mother's funeral. After three hours, cremation was decided upon as the most dignified burial. Since she had been gone for so long before anyone found her, it would have been a closed casket and no one, not even the family, would have been able to see her. Since it was an incredibly bad way to go, Matt felt that the best thing they could do for her would at least to give her some pride in death.
Wednesday was kind of a down day and Matt and I went over to Travis's to go through some pictures and just talk about things. That was when we kind of got the back story to what may have happened with Matt's mom. Bob had been keeping something a secret from Matt and Travis - their mom had been mixed up in drugs. I'm not going to go into details, but it definately answered a lot of questions for Matt and Travis. And it also held a possible answer for her death.
But anywayThe viewing was on Thursday evening and the funeral was on Friday morning. Those were both incredibly difficult days. Now we are back in Findlay and back to normal life. It's weird being back here and both of us having to go back to work and all. Life had completely stopped for the past four days, and now it's back to normal again (well, as normal as can be expected).
So, anyway, the results from the otopsy won't be back for another week probably. Until then, we know that there was no trama involved, so at least she probably didn't suffer. Matt and Travis would just like to know the answer so that the constant wondering as to what happened can be answered.
Oh, and it's incredibly weird to be back in Findlay now after we were at my parents for four straight days. There was always someone around and now it's back to just me and Matt.
Monday, June 11, 2007
Relaxation Officially Over
So, I'm at the station in Toledo and I am so incredibly bored. I haven't really had a whole lot to do all day, and now that it's 4, it's even worse than before. Uggghhh....I wish I could just go home already.
Today I got a call from Walmart. I go in for orientation on Friday morning. I'm excited. I thought I would have to start a lot earlier than Friday, but I'm really glad that I don't. Yippee! So anyway, I go in Friday and I'll prolly have to fill out a bunch of paper work, watch the same boring movies that I watched last year when I worked at Walmart, and then do a bunch of pointless crap on the training computers. I really wish that I didn't have to go through this whole thing again. Orientation is SOOO boring. I wish I could just skip straight to the training part.
The next three days are going to be kind of crazy. I hate it when I don't have time to just sit around and do nothing. Tomorrow, I have to go back to Defiance and I'm going to help with Bible study. Then Wednesday, I'm taking Erica to get her tattoo in BG. It should be fun! I'm excited to go with her. But then, on Thursday, it's back to the station for another long, and probably really boring, day at my internship. And then Friday, I start at Walmart. Wow, I guess my month of relaxation is officially over.
So, I guess I should get back to looking like I'm actually doing something productive. Oh, and by the way, Matt's illness turned out to be nothing. He's doing fine now! Horray!
Today I got a call from Walmart. I go in for orientation on Friday morning. I'm excited. I thought I would have to start a lot earlier than Friday, but I'm really glad that I don't. Yippee! So anyway, I go in Friday and I'll prolly have to fill out a bunch of paper work, watch the same boring movies that I watched last year when I worked at Walmart, and then do a bunch of pointless crap on the training computers. I really wish that I didn't have to go through this whole thing again. Orientation is SOOO boring. I wish I could just skip straight to the training part.
The next three days are going to be kind of crazy. I hate it when I don't have time to just sit around and do nothing. Tomorrow, I have to go back to Defiance and I'm going to help with Bible study. Then Wednesday, I'm taking Erica to get her tattoo in BG. It should be fun! I'm excited to go with her. But then, on Thursday, it's back to the station for another long, and probably really boring, day at my internship. And then Friday, I start at Walmart. Wow, I guess my month of relaxation is officially over.
So, I guess I should get back to looking like I'm actually doing something productive. Oh, and by the way, Matt's illness turned out to be nothing. He's doing fine now! Horray!
Thursday, June 7, 2007
A Paying Job and Illness
I got hired at Walmart in Findlay!! Hip-hip-horray!! I still have about a week before I start, but I went for my interview on Tuesday, and 45 minutes later I walked out of there with a job. I have to wait for my drug test and background check go through, which can take 5 days, but when that gets done, I'll be starting. I'll be working around 25 or 30 hours a week and I'll be making $7.40 an hour. I'm excited! I can't wait to be making real money again! And I need a job really bad because I'm almost always bored on the days that I'm not at my internship. So, anyway, I'll have to give a full report on the job once I actually start.
Onto other things, unfortunately, Matt is sick. He was really out of it this morning and had to call off from work today. He has been really dizzy and really off balance, and kept feeling nausous when he was standing. I had my internship today and I hated to have to leave him at home all by himself. The only really good thing is that I'm getting off an hour early from work so that if I need to take Matt to the doctor tonight, I can. I'm actually more worried about whether or not he has insurance actually. He is supposed to have it with Walmart, but now that he's working part-time instead of full-time, it's hard to tell whether or not his benefits still apply. I don't know - he probably needs to go to a doctor, but I just don't want to have to pay out the ass to go to a clinic. Oh well - who knows what is actually going to happen.
So anyway, other than my little illness scare two weeks ago and Matt being sick now, living in Findlay has been great! I really enjoy being with Matt all the time and the apartment just feels so much like home. It's wonderful! The only thing that I have to say about it that's bad is the fact that I miss my family sometimes. I haven't really got homesick, but sometimes I just think about what summers were like when I was still in high school and when I was younger. The thing I miss most is just hanging out outside at home in the country in the summer. It was always so peaceful...
Onto other things, unfortunately, Matt is sick. He was really out of it this morning and had to call off from work today. He has been really dizzy and really off balance, and kept feeling nausous when he was standing. I had my internship today and I hated to have to leave him at home all by himself. The only really good thing is that I'm getting off an hour early from work so that if I need to take Matt to the doctor tonight, I can. I'm actually more worried about whether or not he has insurance actually. He is supposed to have it with Walmart, but now that he's working part-time instead of full-time, it's hard to tell whether or not his benefits still apply. I don't know - he probably needs to go to a doctor, but I just don't want to have to pay out the ass to go to a clinic. Oh well - who knows what is actually going to happen.
So anyway, other than my little illness scare two weeks ago and Matt being sick now, living in Findlay has been great! I really enjoy being with Matt all the time and the apartment just feels so much like home. It's wonderful! The only thing that I have to say about it that's bad is the fact that I miss my family sometimes. I haven't really got homesick, but sometimes I just think about what summers were like when I was still in high school and when I was younger. The thing I miss most is just hanging out outside at home in the country in the summer. It was always so peaceful...
Thursday, May 24, 2007
A Poke and a Prod
I kind of have some crazy things to talk about. Yesterday I was kind of not feeling well. I had a headache and a neck ache and all throughout the day I kept having lose of vision when I would stand up really fast. Then, later in the evening, I found this bump on the back of my head and it kind of freaked me out. So, today I went to the urgent care clinic here in Findlay. I figured they would just look my over and let me know what was going on. Well, they sent me to the Emergency Room. It was really scary. They had me call Matt so that he could come pick me up and take me to the hospital. We were both really worried. The doctor wouldn't tell us why I needed to go - only that I needed to get a few tests done. So, we went to the hospital and waited for a while. At least Matt was there because otherwise I prolly would have been completely scared out of my mind. He kept me happy, though, and laughing. But anyway, they had me do a CAT Scan and fortunately, it came back perfectly fine. I just have a swollen lymphnode and that is what is prolly aggrivating my neck and stuff. So, anyway, it was really scary, but I'm just happy to know that everything is ok! Now it's time to do the dishes and clean house!
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
Fun times!
Well, let's see, I haven't written a blog in such a long time that I don't even really remember where I left off. But let's just go from the present...
Matt and I moved into the apartment a week ago. It has been so great so far. I love living with him. It's fun and just makes me happy. It only took us about three days before we had the rooms cleaned up and looking good. We still have boxes and crap in the closets, but they're mostly just stuff we don't use all the time. But I do have to say that the apartment looks really nice. We're keeping it really clean, or at least trying. It's fun cooking and cleaning together. I never thought I'd enjoy being grown up so much.
My internship is going great so far. The other day I got to be Assistant Producer, which means I wrote five stories and helped write and research for two different segments. I also got to go our on a run with a reporter. It was a lot of fun. I like it there. Even though I have to work an incredibly long day without even getting paid for it, it's still really enjoyable and I like going all the time.
Matt started his job at the Walmart in Findlay. He doesn't love it, but it's a job. I still don't have a job. I'm really trying to get one at Walmart, too. They're supposedly hiring cashiers right now, so I really gotta call them and try to get an interview. I don't know what I'm going to do if I can't get a job for this summer. I need one really bad. The money would be incredibly helpful and make me feel less horrible for getting loans out from Sallie Mae all the time. Oh well - hopefully something comes through soon.
Well, I think that's about all I have for now. Matt and I are enjoying DVR and our cable and we're watching Price Is Right, which is cool because we are watching it right now because we recorded it on the DVR earlier. It's so great!
Matt and I moved into the apartment a week ago. It has been so great so far. I love living with him. It's fun and just makes me happy. It only took us about three days before we had the rooms cleaned up and looking good. We still have boxes and crap in the closets, but they're mostly just stuff we don't use all the time. But I do have to say that the apartment looks really nice. We're keeping it really clean, or at least trying. It's fun cooking and cleaning together. I never thought I'd enjoy being grown up so much.
My internship is going great so far. The other day I got to be Assistant Producer, which means I wrote five stories and helped write and research for two different segments. I also got to go our on a run with a reporter. It was a lot of fun. I like it there. Even though I have to work an incredibly long day without even getting paid for it, it's still really enjoyable and I like going all the time.
Matt started his job at the Walmart in Findlay. He doesn't love it, but it's a job. I still don't have a job. I'm really trying to get one at Walmart, too. They're supposedly hiring cashiers right now, so I really gotta call them and try to get an interview. I don't know what I'm going to do if I can't get a job for this summer. I need one really bad. The money would be incredibly helpful and make me feel less horrible for getting loans out from Sallie Mae all the time. Oh well - hopefully something comes through soon.
Well, I think that's about all I have for now. Matt and I are enjoying DVR and our cable and we're watching Price Is Right, which is cool because we are watching it right now because we recorded it on the DVR earlier. It's so great!
Thursday, May 3, 2007
Matt's Transfer!!
I just wanted to mention that tonight, Matt heard from the Findlay Walmart and he's transfering!! He's done working on the 11th at the Bryan one and will prolly start at the Findlay one around the 18th or so. But yeah, it's exciting and puts a lot less stress on everything!! Horray!!
Bliss!
Horray for summer! I am so happy for this school year to be over!! I already feel soooo much more relaxed. Now, this school year wasn't horrible, but there were the times of wanting to crawl under a rock and wait out the storm. There were so many things this year that just made things difficult to deal with. I'm really glad to be out of the townhouse. It's strange how you can get along with people but yet living with them just doesn't work for even a minute. And this year in school was soo tiring and full of anxiety. Being producer was really hard work along with all of my classes and finding time to actually just live. With all that said and done, I think I did pretty good in all of my classes. Once again, I think it's going to be a damn Greenwood class that keeps me from my 4.0...Ugghh...I hate his classes. I always end up with a B-. But, I'm pretty sure I'm going to have A's in everything else. Yippee for me!
Now it's onto other things. I really wish that I was moving into the new apartment now. I feel like I'm really unorganized because I have half the stuff for the apartment in my bedroom and the rest is in the mess that I brought back from the townhouse. I think I'm going to have some long days and nights of sorting and organizing before the 15th. I decided to borrow some money from Sallie Mae for the summer. I didn't want to have to worry about trying to pay for the new apartment and possibly not having a job. That would have sucked. So, yeah, now I'm pretty relaxed about the whole money situation. I just really wish that Matt could get his transfer. Otherwise he's prolly going to have to stay with his parents or mine until he can get a job in Findlay. I just really don't want to have to live in that apartment by myself for the first few weeks. I'd be freaked out.
I start my internship on May 14th. I'm so excited!! I can't wait!! I think it's going to be pretty hard at the beginning because as much as it seems like I know a lot at school, it's so much more difficult in a real TV studio. I just hope that I can learn everything fast. Yeah, so I'm going to be there for two days a week - Mondays and Thursdays - and I'm there all day from 9:30 am to 6 pm. That's going to be a really long day, but hey, at least it's something I enjoy. I still need another job, though, because I'll be really bored otherwise. Once I get to Findlay, I'm not really going to have many people that I can talk to and stuff like that, so I'll need a job to keep me busy.
Well, I think that's about enough for today. For the next week, I'm planning on laying around and relaxing, and I can't wait!
Now it's onto other things. I really wish that I was moving into the new apartment now. I feel like I'm really unorganized because I have half the stuff for the apartment in my bedroom and the rest is in the mess that I brought back from the townhouse. I think I'm going to have some long days and nights of sorting and organizing before the 15th. I decided to borrow some money from Sallie Mae for the summer. I didn't want to have to worry about trying to pay for the new apartment and possibly not having a job. That would have sucked. So, yeah, now I'm pretty relaxed about the whole money situation. I just really wish that Matt could get his transfer. Otherwise he's prolly going to have to stay with his parents or mine until he can get a job in Findlay. I just really don't want to have to live in that apartment by myself for the first few weeks. I'd be freaked out.
I start my internship on May 14th. I'm so excited!! I can't wait!! I think it's going to be pretty hard at the beginning because as much as it seems like I know a lot at school, it's so much more difficult in a real TV studio. I just hope that I can learn everything fast. Yeah, so I'm going to be there for two days a week - Mondays and Thursdays - and I'm there all day from 9:30 am to 6 pm. That's going to be a really long day, but hey, at least it's something I enjoy. I still need another job, though, because I'll be really bored otherwise. Once I get to Findlay, I'm not really going to have many people that I can talk to and stuff like that, so I'll need a job to keep me busy.
Well, I think that's about enough for today. For the next week, I'm planning on laying around and relaxing, and I can't wait!
Monday, April 23, 2007
The Torture - The Joy
I simultaniously hate and love the last week of classes. In four days, I'm going to be rejoicing because classes will be over and most of my major projects and papers will be done and handed in, but the time leading up to that it total craziness.
First off, I have a ten page paper to write by Thursday, which I still have yet to start because whenever I think about what I'm going to write my brain starts to hurt. It's for my prophets class, and I have to write about two chapters in the book of Jeremiah. Ugghh...I have no clue what to write. I don't even really understand this crap.
Secondly, I have a test tomorrow in the class that I'm really afraid I'm going to fail. I got a B on the first two tests, but unfortunately I failed the past one, and since they changed the freaking grading scale to the plus/minus scale, now a C- counts as a failing grade, so yeah, I really need to do good on this test! You'd think studying and reading over your notes and whatnot would be helpful in studying, but no, for some god-awful reason, this class is like the class from hell. The tests are totally uncomprehendable. I never understand any of the multiple choice or fill in the blank questions. Now, what doesn't make any sense to me is that I get perfect scores on the essays. So, yeah, obviously I know the information, but the fact of the matter is that I just can't do the multiple choice or fill ins. Double Ugghhh...
Third, I have a project due on Thursday for my Art History class and I still have no clue what I'm even going to do for it. We have to make a modern outdoor sculpture. I don't even know why I stress out about those projects. I always end up getting an A on them (knock on wood). I could probably do it totally wrong, write a two page paper giving some half-assed explanation for my reasoning behind the project, and I'd still get an A (knock on wood once again). But, the fact of the matter is that I still have to do it and it's yet another stress on my life that I don't want to deal with.
Fourthly, I have another ten page paper due by next Thursday. Now, I'm not as worried about this one as the other stuff because I already have five pages written, but still, it is yet another worry to put up on my shelf of anxiety.
And those things are not my only problems at the moment. I called Kohls today to see if they had started hiring yet because I had turned in an application 3 weeks ago. Well, now they're done hiring, so I'm most likely not going to be able to get a job there. Now, I do still have like a month before I really need to get a job, but I would just like to know that I have a shoot at getting one somewhere in Findlay. I have turned in six applications so far in this town and not a single call back. But hey, like I said - I still have a month. So, I'm just keeping my fingers crossed. Oh, and I'm doubly keeping my fingers crossed that Matt gets his transfer to one of the Walmarts here. That would just make things so much easier!
So, after all this other crap is said and done, then I'm going to have to worry about packing and moving and whatnot. I can't wait to be in the new apartment. I'm so excited for it. Although, I'm not really that excited about moving out of the townhouse next week, taking my crap to my parents for a week and a half, and then moving everything back to the new apartment in Findlay.
Now it's back to papers and studying for me!
First off, I have a ten page paper to write by Thursday, which I still have yet to start because whenever I think about what I'm going to write my brain starts to hurt. It's for my prophets class, and I have to write about two chapters in the book of Jeremiah. Ugghh...I have no clue what to write. I don't even really understand this crap.
Secondly, I have a test tomorrow in the class that I'm really afraid I'm going to fail. I got a B on the first two tests, but unfortunately I failed the past one, and since they changed the freaking grading scale to the plus/minus scale, now a C- counts as a failing grade, so yeah, I really need to do good on this test! You'd think studying and reading over your notes and whatnot would be helpful in studying, but no, for some god-awful reason, this class is like the class from hell. The tests are totally uncomprehendable. I never understand any of the multiple choice or fill in the blank questions. Now, what doesn't make any sense to me is that I get perfect scores on the essays. So, yeah, obviously I know the information, but the fact of the matter is that I just can't do the multiple choice or fill ins. Double Ugghhh...
Third, I have a project due on Thursday for my Art History class and I still have no clue what I'm even going to do for it. We have to make a modern outdoor sculpture. I don't even know why I stress out about those projects. I always end up getting an A on them (knock on wood). I could probably do it totally wrong, write a two page paper giving some half-assed explanation for my reasoning behind the project, and I'd still get an A (knock on wood once again). But, the fact of the matter is that I still have to do it and it's yet another stress on my life that I don't want to deal with.
Fourthly, I have another ten page paper due by next Thursday. Now, I'm not as worried about this one as the other stuff because I already have five pages written, but still, it is yet another worry to put up on my shelf of anxiety.
And those things are not my only problems at the moment. I called Kohls today to see if they had started hiring yet because I had turned in an application 3 weeks ago. Well, now they're done hiring, so I'm most likely not going to be able to get a job there. Now, I do still have like a month before I really need to get a job, but I would just like to know that I have a shoot at getting one somewhere in Findlay. I have turned in six applications so far in this town and not a single call back. But hey, like I said - I still have a month. So, I'm just keeping my fingers crossed. Oh, and I'm doubly keeping my fingers crossed that Matt gets his transfer to one of the Walmarts here. That would just make things so much easier!
So, after all this other crap is said and done, then I'm going to have to worry about packing and moving and whatnot. I can't wait to be in the new apartment. I'm so excited for it. Although, I'm not really that excited about moving out of the townhouse next week, taking my crap to my parents for a week and a half, and then moving everything back to the new apartment in Findlay.
Now it's back to papers and studying for me!
Wednesday, April 18, 2007
Hmmm....This world = ??
So, I can't believe all the crap that has been going on lately with the shooting at VA Tech and whatnot. It's so scary. I just can't believe that something like that would happen and people can be that screwed up. New information just keep popping up and it's just unbelievable to me.
I just got finished watching the movie "Children of Men". It's kind of frightening to think that our world could get to that point. That movie is set in 2027, which is only 20 years away. Our world could be shit by then, and it's plausable the way things seem to be going right now.
The thing that's kind of annoying to me is when people say that all the problems in the world are because God is punishing us. I just don't know for sure...That's kind of confusing. If you think about it, humanity has always been pretty screwed up. Maybe it just annoys me because the people always say it with such arrogance as if they couldn't possibly be a part of the reason for any problems in this world. Ugghhh....I'm sorry....I feel like ranting at the moment....
So, ok, onto other things. Today at counseling, I had a pretty good talk with Karyn. I really like her. She's really easy to talk with. She gave me this Attacking Anxiety program and I'm hoping once I start listening to the CDs and whatnot. Actually, though, I think a lot of my problem lately has been my birth control pill. I just changed to a different one a month and a half ago and now I'm all emotional - up and down - all the time. It's horrible. I never used to have this many problems. I'm totally depressed one day and completely bitchy the next. So, yeah, I think I'm going to see if I can get put back on the old pills. Dumn ass meds!
Enough ranting now - On a less depressing note, I watched "The Departed" today. It was SUCHHHH a great movie! I loved it!! It's a movie that actually deserved the Best Picture award. It was just a great all around movie. It gives me a glimmer of hope for the movie business and that maybe not all the new stuff is crap.
I just got finished watching the movie "Children of Men". It's kind of frightening to think that our world could get to that point. That movie is set in 2027, which is only 20 years away. Our world could be shit by then, and it's plausable the way things seem to be going right now.
The thing that's kind of annoying to me is when people say that all the problems in the world are because God is punishing us. I just don't know for sure...That's kind of confusing. If you think about it, humanity has always been pretty screwed up. Maybe it just annoys me because the people always say it with such arrogance as if they couldn't possibly be a part of the reason for any problems in this world. Ugghhh....I'm sorry....I feel like ranting at the moment....
So, ok, onto other things. Today at counseling, I had a pretty good talk with Karyn. I really like her. She's really easy to talk with. She gave me this Attacking Anxiety program and I'm hoping once I start listening to the CDs and whatnot. Actually, though, I think a lot of my problem lately has been my birth control pill. I just changed to a different one a month and a half ago and now I'm all emotional - up and down - all the time. It's horrible. I never used to have this many problems. I'm totally depressed one day and completely bitchy the next. So, yeah, I think I'm going to see if I can get put back on the old pills. Dumn ass meds!
Enough ranting now - On a less depressing note, I watched "The Departed" today. It was SUCHHHH a great movie! I loved it!! It's a movie that actually deserved the Best Picture award. It was just a great all around movie. It gives me a glimmer of hope for the movie business and that maybe not all the new stuff is crap.
Monday, April 16, 2007
Two weeks to go!
Only two weeks left of school! I can't believe it. Even after all the craziness of this year and living in the townhouse and being producer at the station, it still seems like it went really fast. At times, the townhouse made it feel like every week was a year, but looking back now, it seems like it only lasted a few weeks.
I have a feeling this week is going to be kind of crazy. I have a 8-10 page research paper due on Thursday along with a 15 minute presentation. I have a big test in Newswriting on Friday, which is really important because it could mean the difference between an A or B in that class. I also have to start working on my Art History project, which is due in a week, and on my final paper for Old Testament Prophets class that's due Tuesday next week. Uggghhhh....I really hate the end of the year.
Today I went to Kohls to change when I can start working if they would hire me. Originally, I had put on there that I couldn't start until May 15th, but I don't think that was a good idea, so I went and changed it to I can start immediately. I can start while I'm still at school and then I'll just have to not work for the two weeks that I'm not here. I don't know - I hope that works. I at least want a chance to talk to them. I really wanna work there!
This weekend was pretty interesting. We had a High School Girls Retreat at church and I was part of the team. We spent Friday and Saturday at the girl scout camp. It was pretty interesting. A lot of just talking about who we are and what we believe. We did this group initiative exercise too, which was really cool because we did this Trust Climb thing. It was pretty exciting. Also, this weekend, my mom and I went and got the rest of my stuff for the bedroom at the new apartment. It's so exciting to be buying that stuff. I don't know why I like it so much. I'm mostly just spending money I don't really have. Oh well!
So anyway, I think that's about all I have to talk about for now. I should really get back to working on all of my homework and papers and whatnot. Blahh....
I have a feeling this week is going to be kind of crazy. I have a 8-10 page research paper due on Thursday along with a 15 minute presentation. I have a big test in Newswriting on Friday, which is really important because it could mean the difference between an A or B in that class. I also have to start working on my Art History project, which is due in a week, and on my final paper for Old Testament Prophets class that's due Tuesday next week. Uggghhhh....I really hate the end of the year.
Today I went to Kohls to change when I can start working if they would hire me. Originally, I had put on there that I couldn't start until May 15th, but I don't think that was a good idea, so I went and changed it to I can start immediately. I can start while I'm still at school and then I'll just have to not work for the two weeks that I'm not here. I don't know - I hope that works. I at least want a chance to talk to them. I really wanna work there!
This weekend was pretty interesting. We had a High School Girls Retreat at church and I was part of the team. We spent Friday and Saturday at the girl scout camp. It was pretty interesting. A lot of just talking about who we are and what we believe. We did this group initiative exercise too, which was really cool because we did this Trust Climb thing. It was pretty exciting. Also, this weekend, my mom and I went and got the rest of my stuff for the bedroom at the new apartment. It's so exciting to be buying that stuff. I don't know why I like it so much. I'm mostly just spending money I don't really have. Oh well!
So anyway, I think that's about all I have to talk about for now. I should really get back to working on all of my homework and papers and whatnot. Blahh....
Tuesday, April 10, 2007
My Birthday!
My birthday was pretty great today. I had classes, so that kind of sucked. I hate the fact that my birthday had to fall on a Tuesday, which is a day that I have three classes, as oppossed to a Monday, Wednesday, or Friday where I only have one class. But oh well. I guess it wasn't horrible. The townhouse ladies and I went out to the Red Pig Inn to have dinner and it was a pretty good time had by all. They got me a gift card to Walmart for 75 bucks, so that should be useful in buying more stuff for the new apartment, especially the really great comforter that I want for our bedroom.
My family came here later. They got me a clock and a light for the new apartment, along with some batteries, which are always good to have around the house. And they also got me a 40 dollar gift card to Walmart, so I'm definitely going to be getting my moneys worth out of Walmart in the next month or so. Then we went out to Frickers and they bought me my first alcoholic drink. I have to say that I didn't really enjoy it. I mean, it wasn't horrible, but it wasn't really something I thought was wonderful either. I could taste the alcohol, which really bothered me. So, yeah, I guess I'm just not going to be indulging in that constantly.
But anyway, now I'm bored, sitting around here at the townhouse doing nothing. Because I only have my one class on Wednesdays, I hardly ever have stuff to do on Tuesday nights. I think I'm going to turn on the TV, though, and maybe play a little Castlevania.
My family came here later. They got me a clock and a light for the new apartment, along with some batteries, which are always good to have around the house. And they also got me a 40 dollar gift card to Walmart, so I'm definitely going to be getting my moneys worth out of Walmart in the next month or so. Then we went out to Frickers and they bought me my first alcoholic drink. I have to say that I didn't really enjoy it. I mean, it wasn't horrible, but it wasn't really something I thought was wonderful either. I could taste the alcohol, which really bothered me. So, yeah, I guess I'm just not going to be indulging in that constantly.
But anyway, now I'm bored, sitting around here at the townhouse doing nothing. Because I only have my one class on Wednesdays, I hardly ever have stuff to do on Tuesday nights. I think I'm going to turn on the TV, though, and maybe play a little Castlevania.
Monday, April 9, 2007
Turning 21
Tomorrow is my birthday. Well, actually, in about two hours I will officially be 21. Strangely, though, I've been kind of depressed the past few days. I hope that goes away, though. I think it may be my new pills. I've been all hormonal and I've been having headaches a lot. But anyway, tomorrow I'm going out with the townhouse ladies, at least that's the plan. Then, the family is coming down and we're going to go out again, but this time so that they can buy me my first alcoholic drink. I also have to go down to the DMV to get my new license, which I'm really excited about because in my old one I'm fat. Haha.... So, anyway, that should all be fun. Hopefully I'm not getting sick. My nose has been bothering me today. I only wish that I didn't have to go to class tomorrow since it's my bday. Oh, Matt already gave me my present. He got me "Happy Feet"! I can't wait to watch it! It looks really cute!
Moving on to other things...today was my last day of Easter break. I hate coming back to school after a break. I never do any of my school work while I'm on a break because I think a break is supposed to be relaxing. But, unfortunately, coming back sucks because I always have tons of stuff to catch up on. Which reminds me - I need to be working on that stuff right now instead of writing this.
Oh, just one more thing really quick - This past weekend, I bought a Castlevania game! I'm so excited about it! I've been playing it nonstop! I really wish I had money to get some more. I'm really getting into the whole story and the games are really fun and interesting! Ok, sorry, just had to mention that last thing!
Moving on to other things...today was my last day of Easter break. I hate coming back to school after a break. I never do any of my school work while I'm on a break because I think a break is supposed to be relaxing. But, unfortunately, coming back sucks because I always have tons of stuff to catch up on. Which reminds me - I need to be working on that stuff right now instead of writing this.
Oh, just one more thing really quick - This past weekend, I bought a Castlevania game! I'm so excited about it! I've been playing it nonstop! I really wish I had money to get some more. I'm really getting into the whole story and the games are really fun and interesting! Ok, sorry, just had to mention that last thing!
Thursday, April 5, 2007
First Post
In five days I will be turning 21. So many things are changing in my life right now, and I think I need a place to store all of my thoughts, so I figured this may be a good place.
I'm about to finish my third year in college, which is scary to think about. I only have one more year before I'm really part of the real world. Matt, my fiance, and I have had a long distance relationship now for three years, but we decided that we're going to be getting a place together this summer in Findlay. We have our apartment on hold and it's small but quaint and sweet. I've already bought a bunch of stuff for it. I think it's going to be exciting having my own place and decorating it with Matt. This past year, I lived in a townhouse at school with five other girls....Ugghhh....Let's just say it wasn't the best environment....
So, Matt and I move into our new place on May 15th. I'm hoping all goes well. I think it's going to be fun to live with him. Hopefully I won't be as stressed out about stuff as I am living at the townhouse.
Yesterday, I went to ABC 13 in Toledo for an interview for their internship program. It was exciting. Being in a real news room is such a thrill. I LOVE the atmosphere...I know, totally GEEKY!! Anyway, the interview went incredibly well and I came out of it with a position as an intern for this summer. I'm going to be doing producing stuff, which is so incredibly wonderful. I love producing! So, I think I'm starting sometime in May, hopefully after Matt and I have already moved into the new place. I can't wait! It's going to be fun!
I'm also looking for another job for the summer. Since the internship is unpaid, I sort of still need a job to pay the rent and bills. I put in an application at Kohls in Findlay, so I hope that I hear from them soon. I think it would be cool to work at Kohls. I shop there all the time, so hey, a discount would be nice. Haha!
So anyway, I think that's enough for my first post. I usually blog on myspace, but I've been getting really tired of myspace lately, so I think this will be a good avenue for my thoughts. I hope I keep up with this!
I'm about to finish my third year in college, which is scary to think about. I only have one more year before I'm really part of the real world. Matt, my fiance, and I have had a long distance relationship now for three years, but we decided that we're going to be getting a place together this summer in Findlay. We have our apartment on hold and it's small but quaint and sweet. I've already bought a bunch of stuff for it. I think it's going to be exciting having my own place and decorating it with Matt. This past year, I lived in a townhouse at school with five other girls....Ugghhh....Let's just say it wasn't the best environment....
So, Matt and I move into our new place on May 15th. I'm hoping all goes well. I think it's going to be fun to live with him. Hopefully I won't be as stressed out about stuff as I am living at the townhouse.
Yesterday, I went to ABC 13 in Toledo for an interview for their internship program. It was exciting. Being in a real news room is such a thrill. I LOVE the atmosphere...I know, totally GEEKY!! Anyway, the interview went incredibly well and I came out of it with a position as an intern for this summer. I'm going to be doing producing stuff, which is so incredibly wonderful. I love producing! So, I think I'm starting sometime in May, hopefully after Matt and I have already moved into the new place. I can't wait! It's going to be fun!
I'm also looking for another job for the summer. Since the internship is unpaid, I sort of still need a job to pay the rent and bills. I put in an application at Kohls in Findlay, so I hope that I hear from them soon. I think it would be cool to work at Kohls. I shop there all the time, so hey, a discount would be nice. Haha!
So anyway, I think that's enough for my first post. I usually blog on myspace, but I've been getting really tired of myspace lately, so I think this will be a good avenue for my thoughts. I hope I keep up with this!
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